👋 Hi, I’m Jeff.
I write weekly about lessons I’ve learned leading product teams and working to lead well in chaotic environments, drawing on 25+ years of experience. If you’re a leader, operator, or founder, I hope you’ll subscribe.
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Would you be up for a coffee?
Many times over the course of my career, across different types of companies, I’ve had conversations that start exactly this way.
Almost everyone agrees mentors are important. But I’ve also noticed that people sometimes over-index on mentors as the primary driver of career growth. That can lead to collecting mentors and building mentorship relationships — while missing something deeper.
One of my biggest takeaways, from watching my own career and others unfold, is this: don’t confuse mentors with sponsors. The distinction matters far more than most people realize.
The framing that shaped my thinking here comes from Herminia Ibarra’s original Harvard Business Review article, Why Men Still Get More Promotions Than Women. But I’ve seen this pattern play out with women and men alike across early, mid, and late careers.
So what’s the difference between a mentor and a sponsor?
A mentor is usually someone who will grab a cup of coffee, share parts of their experience, and offer advice. Sometimes mentors act as role models, which can be incredibly helpful — especially early in a career, but often later as well.
Mentors help you think, reflect, and avoid obvious mistakes. But their skin in the game is limited. I’ve certainly been on the giving side of this relationship. In these scenarios, I’m offering information, perspective, and a few ideas. For the most part, that’s where my involvement ends.
A sponsor is fundamentally different.
A sponsor may actually give very little advice. Instead, they’re willing to put their credibility and reputation on the line for you. This usually happens in conversations — or rooms — you’re not even in. There is real risk involved. I’ve also been in these situations, and they feel completely different.
A sponsor hires you.
Or promotes you.
Or aggressively advocates for you to be hired or promoted.
Andy Grove wrote that promotions aren’t rewards — they’re bets. When someone sponsors you, they’re doing exactly that: staking their credibility on your future performance.
Mentors provide information. Sponsors create opportunity. Over time, that difference compounds — even across the middle stages of a career. A small number of key sponsor relationships can have an outsized impact.
Here are a few actions that come from this distinction:
Don’t collect mentors. Avoid lots of conversations and advice without ever building the kind of relationship that turns into sponsorship.
Be honest with yourself about who in your professional life is offering guidance — and who might someday be willing to bet on you. Sponsors don’t emerge because you asked for advice. They emerge because you consistently do great work that someone knows — or is willing to believe — will continue. Consider asking potential sponsors if they’d be willing to advocate for you in the right situation. I’ve had people ask me directly whether I’d do this for them if the moment came up.
If you’re mentoring someone, consider going further. Advocacy is often what actually changes someone’s trajectory. Don’t stop at delivering information if you’re in a position to do more.
Instead of asking, “Who should I get coffee with?”
It may be more useful to ask, “Who is watching my work closely enough that they’d vouch for me?” Once you have your answer, think about how you’re creating the conditions for that relationship to deepen.
That shift alone can change how you invest your time — and how your career unfolds.
It’s far more powerful than just grabbing coffee.
If this helped you think more clearly about leading teams or products, I write here once a week.
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